"...if we mean business with God, He is not going to allow us to be deceived. I mean that the Holy Spirit is going to expose our true selves. He is going to uncover us and show us thoroughly there is nothing sound in us, nothing to be relied upon in us, in order that He may make it equally clear that it is only in Christ, God's Son, that there is security, and safety and life..."
This is what I'm learning: there is nothing sound in me, nothing to be relied on. There is nothing at all commendable about who I am inside. We all have facades, and I admit that I act 'holier' than I am. Don't be fooled by me, seriously, I am not good. I guess I just needed to get this out here, cos I always tend to claim God's credit. Learning that you are really nothing is a terribly hard lesson to learn...all the same, it's definitely a lesson I need to learn better.
I am wondering...how healthy is a blog really is. When you put yourself out there, you can't help but wonder how people receive your thoughts. I admit that blogging makes me think about myself more than I already do. This is partly why I haven't shared my blog with many people, and why I tell people not to link me. Most of you know me well enough to see through any facades that I may be tempted to construct. You'll know if I'm a fraud - that is, if you see discrepancy between the words I speak and the life I live.
I'll be blogging less for a while, I think I've been blogging too much as of late. (I'm not saying that blogging is bad - I'm saying that it's not good for where I happen to be right now.) I want to live out my testimony in the real world, not type formless thoughts in the cyber world. I want to spend more time being Jesus' hands and feet, not merely talking about it or trying to look like it.
I hope God will change this proud and deceitful heart. Please say a prayer for me sometime, I think I need it. And definitely - let me know if I can pray for you. Prayer is the only means by which anything gets done...let us remember that it isn't us at all.
By the way, here's what sparked all this thought: I was browsing through old entries in Aaron's xanga. See you guys in the real world!
Thursday, June 16, 2005
How abstract. I'm speaking to an audience of prospective billions yet looking at a computer screen. Knowing that effective communication most often consists of non-verbal dialogue, where does this put us? Interesting...
My generation loves this. Whoever said that technology and media should usurp the family structure and dynamic that was established by our Heavenly Father? Could it be that a revolution is happening? How about the fact that because you are reading this you have already been manipulated by western culture to communicate in unconventional ways?
Words are a mere reflection of the deeper reality in the heart.
"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, oh God my Rock and my Redeemer." - King David - Jerusalem, Israel
"You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." - Jesus Christ A.D. 30 approximately :)
My prayer is that you might be blessed and informed by the overflow of a heart that yearns for the Presence of God. What do you yearn for?
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